


Sunset Dawn

by DisposalUnit



Category: Person of Interest (TV) RPF
Genre: First Kiss, M/M, Pansexual Character, Religious Guilt, Self-Acceptance, discussion of polyamory
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-05
Updated: 2016-05-05
Packaged: 2018-06-06 11:29:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,671
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6752158
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DisposalUnit/pseuds/DisposalUnit
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Fill for an anonymous prompt at the POI Kinkfest. ( https://the-ragnarok.dreamwidth.org/36632.html )</p><p>Prompt: <i>Caviezel/Emerson RPS.... please...  I can't believe I'm asking for this but I need it badly. Porn or G-rated fluff or just your thoughts on the subject in general please help I can't find ANYTHING</i></p><p>NOTE: Anyone may continue/adapt/remix this particular work, as long as they mention that DisposalUnit deserves some of the credit. And please let me know via comment, so I can see! (Please do NOT use any of my non-real-person fics without my permission.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sunset Dawn

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. While some real-life facts are incorporated, it is a work of fiction and should not, in any way, be interpreted or relied on as a reflection of reality.

\---Summer, 2016---

_I’m in LA. Can we meet up?_

Michael blinked at the text message. Jim had never before reached out to socialize, outside of work or work-related events. He set his book aside and responded.

_Certainly! Lunch tomorrow?_

Two chapters later, he received a response.

_Tonight? Loew's Santa Monica #702_

Michael checked his watch. At 7:43pm, rush hour was over and the evening was still young. Carrie was out with her friends and probably wouldn't be back for several more hours. If Jim wanted to stay away from the enthusiastic public and have a drink in the privacy of his (no doubt) ocean-view hotel suite, this would still be a pleasant diversion from Michael's recent routine of reading at home all evening.

He took Chumley for a walk, then put a couple of puppy pads out on the floor, just in case. He brushed his teeth and changed into a set of fresher, more presentable clothing.

_On my way._

\----------

Jim opened his hotel room door and gestured for Michael to enter, then looked up and down the hallway before closing the door behind them.

"Did anyone recognize you?" he asked.

"Nice to see you, too," Michael chuckled. "I stopped to be in one young man's selfie, but other than him, just the valet."

“Did you tell him you were here to see me?”

“He didn’t ask. Why?”

Jim ran a hand through his hair nervously. "Just don't want someone tweeting that they saw us here."

"I wouldn't worry about it." Michael may have played a very private person in their work together, but Jim was the private one in reality. He looked around the spacious suite, empty of personal belongings except for a carry-on bag. "What brings you to Los Angeles?"

Jim scratched his nose and walked to the sliding glass balcony doors but didn’t open them. He stood, looking out at the orange and pink skies over the Santa Monica Bay as the sun set. He hugged his arms to himself, crossing them over his slim-fitting, dark gray polo shirt.

"Jim? Are you all right?"

"...You," he whispered.

Michael doubted his hearing. "What?"

Jim turned his head to face him, eyes haunted. "You. I came here to see you."

Michael stepped close enough to put a hand on Jim's shoulder in a supportive gesture. Clearly, something had shaken Jim to the core, but why come to _him_? "What is it? What can I do?"

"Tell me again that it's normal," Jim whispered, looking back out across the water.

"Tell you—? Jim, I don't understand."

"Tell me again that it's okay for a man to... have impure thoughts about another man."

Oh. Michael thought back to that one, bitterly cold NYC night, when technical issues were making it take forever to get shots in the can. The night they’d gone into double overtime, and they’d both been overtired and irritable. The night Jim had made a sound of disgust under his breath when a nearby member of the crew showed off his new wedding ring to his coworkers and talked about the honeymoon he'd taken with his new husband. The night Michael had gently tried to talk with Jim, bleary-eyed as they both were, over second meal at 3am, about how Jim’s too-apparent negative attitude toward LGBTQ people made some of the crew uncomfortable. That night Jim had clammed up and become even more surly than he already had been.

Michael knew that the Church was central to Jim's life, central to his very selfhood. His public image epitomized the good Catholic husband and father. His social circles probably consisted almost entirely of sports luminaries and very religious conservatives. He'd played Jesus on the big screen, for Christ's sake.

As a former Catholic, Michael got it. To feel something at odds with the Church's position was to be filled with doubt, frustration, fear-- Fear that maybe the Church wasn't right about everything, after all. Fear that everyone he cared about would reject him for believing differently. Fear that he would burn in Hell for questioning.

That Jim would spontaneously fly all this way, just to bring this up with his one left-leaning friend...

Oh. Oh, poor Jim, coming to this realization about himself and feeling so alone.

He squeezed Jim's shoulder. "It's perfectly normal, perfectly healthy to be attracted to someone of the same gender, or any gender, for that matter," he said gently, carefully. "I don't believe a loving God could fault someone for loving whomever they do."

"And for giving in to that temptation?" Jim asked, not looking at Michael.

"That," Michael sighed, "is a stickier question, when the matter of marital fidelity is involved." He licked his lips. "I think honesty with one's partner or partners is essential. But I also feel that, as one learns more about oneself in their journey through life... Vows made in youth may need to be reconsidered."

Jim looked as though he’d just been given a cancer diagnosis for a few moments, then turned his expression of horror into a defeatist, partial smile. “Easier said than done.”

“Yes, I know,” Michael confirmed, eyes sad.

Jim’s eyebrows perked up. “Michael, have you...? Reconsidered your vows?”

Michael’s jaw tensed as he weighed the risks and benefits of sharing such private information, deciding quickly that Jim needed honesty, and that he would provide it.

He took a deep breath and released it in a heavy sigh. “When I came to terms with my pansexuality, I was honest with my wife. That honesty cost me my first marriage, but it was necessary. I couldn’t live a lie.” A pause as he looked down at the carpet, ghosts of past pain evident. Then his pale blue eyes came back up to look out at the endless ocean. “From the very beginning of my relationship with Carrie, I’ve been honest about who I am. And we’ve... we’ve always had an agreement.” He pushed his glasses up his nose. “We have an open marriage. Each of us is free to have dalliances with other people, as long as Carrie and I give one another ‘veto power.’ And as long as we practice... _safe-enough_ sex. A partner’s negative test results can lead to relaxing of safe-sex barrier rules,” he explained.

Jim stared at him as though he’d just admitted to being from the planet Mars and begun speaking Martian. “Wait, you can... just have sex with anyone?!”

“Within reason, of course. ‘Don't shit where you eat,’ as the saying goes, so we avoid workplace relationships of a romantic or sexual nature.”

“No, I mean... You have sex with men?”

“Sometimes, yes. I’m attracted to all genders-- Male, female, and non-binary—that is, genders that are neither male nor female.” He licked his lips again, feeling exceedngly vulnerable at having revealed so much about his private life. “I— I realize that you’re in a very different situation, Jim, and that such an arrangement would likely not be an option for your marriage. But, the point is that you’ve learned something very important about yourself. And no matter the consequences, self-knowledge is always a step in the direction of self-actualization—Of long-term, authentic happiness.”

Jim leaned fhis forehead aganst the sliding glass door and choked back something that was both a sob and a laugh. “That’s pretty damn hard to believe, from where I’m standing.”

“Right now, I’m sure your feelings do feel more like a ruinous secret than a guidepost pointing in the direction of your happiness.” Michael placed a warm, soothing hand on the back of Jim’s neck. “Please trust me that, if you embrace it, your outlook will become much, much brighter.”

In the blink of an eye, Jim was kissing Michael aggressively, like a horny teenager who’d never heard the word ‘foreplay.’ Michael, too stunned to respond, stood passively until Jim was finished, a few moments later.

Jim broke away, panting. Seeing the confusion in Michael’s enormous blue eyes, he turned away, ashamed. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

“Jim—” A worried sigh. “Jim, there’s no need to apologize! I was just taken by surprise.” He hugged the taller man from behind, wrapping his arms around Jim’s lean, muscled torso and holding him close. “To be completely honest, I’ve been attracted to you for a very long time, but I never dreamed you might... feel the same way.”

“But ‘don’t shit where you eat,’” Jim moaned, not letting Michael see his face. “I understand why you can’t, with me. I’m sorry I—”

“We’re not co-workers anymore,” Michael purred, running a hand down the younger man’s firm pecs and abs, through the soft gray shirt. “I’d be positively thrilled to help you explore your newfound desires.”

Jim felt a warm hardness pressing against the back of his thigh. “Oh,” he whispered, half in disbelief that this was really happening. “Can we... start right now?”

“Just one moment, Jim, darling,” Michael assured him as he patted his shoulder and stepped away to pull the iPhone from his pocket.

_Carrie, my love, I’m in a hotel room with JC. He’s discovered something about himself. May I help him investigate further?_

Jim looked excitedly at the room service wine list, but he didn’t know a Merlot from a Riesling, so he handed it to Michael. “We should get wine. To set the mood. Or maybe beer? You pick.”

Before Michael could answer, he received a text message in reply.

_FUCK YES!!! If you take pictures, let me see when you get home. And maybe invite me in the future... Have fun, Michael, my love!_

He grinned, his heart swelling with love for his wife, then pulled up his phone’s contacts to find the number of a very discreet service he liked that could deliver condoms, lube, and sex toys to most parts of the city within an hour.

“Let’s get an ice bucket filled with bottles of a craft beer that you’ve never had before,” Michael smiled, his eyes at once brilliant and sultry. “Tonight will be all about new experiences.”


End file.
